A Meme Called Fred
Jun. 20th, 2003 02:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lprovenLate as ever.
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dougs interviewed me. Asking him was a considered decision. He did not give me easy, quickly-dismissed questions. I didn’t think he would.
Hmmm. Depends on the person, the manner and the subject of disagreement.
I love to argue. It’s one of my favourite pastimes. Kjersti and I had some crackers, but with one snag: not only has she studied formal logic, on subjects like capital punishment or transsexuality, she’s vastly better read than I. She is, in précis, a more fearsome disputant than the Milliard Gargantubrain. I lost. A lot.
But some arguments are unwinnable. Religion is one of those. Really, at heart, either you believe in your reason, or in faith. I have next to no faith – I strive to eliminate it from my thinking. There is no answer to this one; you cannot argue it out. Nonetheless, it’s an endlessly fun one to play with.
But there are other things I will happily debate. I can argue for Linux and open source, or against it, equally happily; I think both sides have strong cases to make, and I’ll shamelessly take whichever seems likely to yield a more interesting discussion.
On others, like blood sports, say, I am more careful. I feel very strongly about this, and whereas I can put my case well, others can too, and I will not lose it gracefully; I care too much. Similarly with whaling – and try that one with a Norwegian sometime.
On others, it’s open. My futile little crusade against pointless online anonymity. It’s fun, but I do care, a bit; thus, I’ll not easily give in when out-reasoned. It’s not credo, it’s just a strongly-felt opinion. Those are bad ones.
So I tend to play on ones I know I can win, or ones I know I can’t. Where it’s open, and I care, that’s less fun.
NHS bionic man, moi. We can rebuild him – worse, weaker, slower than he was before!
Life without motorbikes. Hmmm. It’d be different, but not totally; I think it would have ended up in broadly similar shape. My self-chosen image-change in my mid 20s – I know, few of you knew me then, but it was a biggie - was predicated partly on bikes, so it would have played out differently.
I guess, rationally, I’d have to say, no bikes. The injury doesn’t affect me a lot, and in some ways, I like the way it’s led my life. No bikes, no house, for example – the deposit on this domicile was my insurance payout.
But that’s if I’d have known. I did know the risks. My mum is a nurse. You know what nurses call bikers? Donors.
I knew. I accepted it. I still do, much modified.
(I'm not sure I'm that obsessed...)
Oh, that’s easy.
I’m not a real computer guru. I’m a pretend one – a very knowledgeable hobbyist. I have not studied it academically in real depth – just as much as I could, while pursuing my real passion:
Biology.
I always intended to be a professional biologist. Probably evolutionary ecology, from preference, aquatic or marine microbiology or invertebrate palæontology, probably. If it’s big enough to see, I’m not really interested, but I can talk for hours on the joys of rotifers and tardigrades or the fascination of the preCambrian explosion as exemplified by the Burgess Shale. My first school project, at age 7, was entitled “Marine Life of the Silurian, Devonian and Ordovician periods”. No, really.
I got very disillusioned with academia, and there was easy money in computers. And here I am.
Ohboy.
Are we talking sexual ones here, or in general? The former is censored. The latter…
In general, I love underdogs, rarities, weird stuff; things that don’t fit the normal pattern. I have friends who express their individuality with weird clothes, weird hairstyles, body modification, stuff like that. That’s fine. If they want.
But it’s not really strange today. So many people do it, it’s not very weird any more.
I’m weirder than most of them. My clothes are simple and black; I don’t really have a hairstyle any more, just hair, though I pine for one again. Oh yes, piercings. I've got more than anyone - a pierced arm and a pierced leg. Don't piss about with earlobes and eyebrows, me. But, of course, I didn't choose them; I have no tattoos, no piercings, not even ears.
But look at my bicycle or my motorcycles. My attitudes and opinions (q.v. religion, above). My sex life.
They’re much weirder. Strangers point and stare at my vehicles, and friends edge away nervously or look profoundly shocked at my personal life.
That’s really being different. It matters more than a haircut or a tattoo.
I think it’s exceptionally brave and shows considerable strength of character. You’re an unusual man; your choice of appearance shows a considerable disregard for many conventional standards, your private life too; you married someone considerably older than you, you have unusual sexual preferences which are, shall we say, not secret; you’re openly Christian although this is atypical in your peer group. You have more than many people to hide, yet you have chosen not to. That’s commendable. I think more people should do so.
And yet, this is not some lifelong policy style – it’s a recent decision. That takes even more guts.
For others? Yes, I think it would work for most people, but I think many people’s lives revolve around certain secrets. If they suddenly opened up about them, told all when asked, their relationships would fall apart, their families disown them and their jobs evaporate. It takes both courage and discretion to be totally honest. It’s admirable, but it’s harder than it looks in several different ways. To do it, to do it carefully and to do it judiciously. A fine balancing act.
You seem to be making it work. I, for one, am impressed.
For me?
I’m trying to do it, but only in part. There are some things I still feel would be very harmful for some people to know, and I see no benefit in it. So I’m keeping some cards close to my chest, while being more open about others – including close, painful, personal stuff – than ever before.
I hope it works out in the long run.
I have to add this part…
It hasn’t done with Kjersti.
I told the woman I love what I really wanted and needed, and what it was that she was doing that I really could not stand.
Look what happened.
Is 303 words enough?
dougs interviewed me. Asking him was a considered decision. He did not give me easy, quickly-dismissed questions. I didn’t think he would.1) There is a history of disagreement between you and me -- and we state our respective opinions, we recognise they differ, we move on. There is a history of disagreement between you and other people -- and it doesn't play out in quite the same way. Your analysis?
Hmmm. Depends on the person, the manner and the subject of disagreement.
I love to argue. It’s one of my favourite pastimes. Kjersti and I had some crackers, but with one snag: not only has she studied formal logic, on subjects like capital punishment or transsexuality, she’s vastly better read than I. She is, in précis, a more fearsome disputant than the Milliard Gargantubrain. I lost. A lot.
But some arguments are unwinnable. Religion is one of those. Really, at heart, either you believe in your reason, or in faith. I have next to no faith – I strive to eliminate it from my thinking. There is no answer to this one; you cannot argue it out. Nonetheless, it’s an endlessly fun one to play with.
But there are other things I will happily debate. I can argue for Linux and open source, or against it, equally happily; I think both sides have strong cases to make, and I’ll shamelessly take whichever seems likely to yield a more interesting discussion.
On others, like blood sports, say, I am more careful. I feel very strongly about this, and whereas I can put my case well, others can too, and I will not lose it gracefully; I care too much. Similarly with whaling – and try that one with a Norwegian sometime.
On others, it’s open. My futile little crusade against pointless online anonymity. It’s fun, but I do care, a bit; thus, I’ll not easily give in when out-reasoned. It’s not credo, it’s just a strongly-felt opinion. Those are bad ones.
So I tend to play on ones I know I can win, or ones I know I can’t. Where it’s open, and I care, that’s less fun.
2) Putting it bluntly, you're a bit of a rebuild. This is not unusual for someone who loves two wheels as much as you do. Rewind, replay. You have the choice of the life you've had, or a life without bikes and without injury. What do you choose? Why?
NHS bionic man, moi. We can rebuild him – worse, weaker, slower than he was before!
Life without motorbikes. Hmmm. It’d be different, but not totally; I think it would have ended up in broadly similar shape. My self-chosen image-change in my mid 20s – I know, few of you knew me then, but it was a biggie - was predicated partly on bikes, so it would have played out differently.
I guess, rationally, I’d have to say, no bikes. The injury doesn’t affect me a lot, and in some ways, I like the way it’s led my life. No bikes, no house, for example – the deposit on this domicile was my insurance payout.
But that’s if I’d have known. I did know the risks. My mum is a nurse. You know what nurses call bikers? Donors.
I knew. I accepted it. I still do, much modified.
3) You're a computer nut. Seriously. Your interest in, and enjoyment of, computers stretches the boundary of what's sane. (Ahem, is this me talking?) If you weren't working with computers, what would you be doing? If you weren't playing with computers, what would you be doing?
(I'm not sure I'm that obsessed...)
Oh, that’s easy.
I’m not a real computer guru. I’m a pretend one – a very knowledgeable hobbyist. I have not studied it academically in real depth – just as much as I could, while pursuing my real passion:
Biology.
I always intended to be a professional biologist. Probably evolutionary ecology, from preference, aquatic or marine microbiology or invertebrate palæontology, probably. If it’s big enough to see, I’m not really interested, but I can talk for hours on the joys of rotifers and tardigrades or the fascination of the preCambrian explosion as exemplified by the Burgess Shale. My first school project, at age 7, was entitled “Marine Life of the Silurian, Devonian and Ordovician periods”. No, really.
I got very disillusioned with academia, and there was easy money in computers. And here I am.
4) Same question as trav28 asked me: Fetishes - do you have any? If so, what are they?
Ohboy.
Are we talking sexual ones here, or in general? The former is censored. The latter…
In general, I love underdogs, rarities, weird stuff; things that don’t fit the normal pattern. I have friends who express their individuality with weird clothes, weird hairstyles, body modification, stuff like that. That’s fine. If they want.
But it’s not really strange today. So many people do it, it’s not very weird any more.
I’m weirder than most of them. My clothes are simple and black; I don’t really have a hairstyle any more, just hair, though I pine for one again. Oh yes, piercings. I've got more than anyone - a pierced arm and a pierced leg. Don't piss about with earlobes and eyebrows, me. But, of course, I didn't choose them; I have no tattoos, no piercings, not even ears.
But look at my bicycle or my motorcycles. My attitudes and opinions (q.v. religion, above). My sex life.
They’re much weirder. Strangers point and stare at my vehicles, and friends edge away nervously or look profoundly shocked at my personal life.
That’s really being different. It matters more than a haircut or a tattoo.
5) A question concerning something you've said before about me, more than once, and each time in ten or fewer words, often including words like "admire". This time, I want you to write at least a couple of hundred words. What do you really feel about the "Without Masks" approach? Do you think it would work for anyone else? Do you think it would work for you? How? Why?
I think it’s exceptionally brave and shows considerable strength of character. You’re an unusual man; your choice of appearance shows a considerable disregard for many conventional standards, your private life too; you married someone considerably older than you, you have unusual sexual preferences which are, shall we say, not secret; you’re openly Christian although this is atypical in your peer group. You have more than many people to hide, yet you have chosen not to. That’s commendable. I think more people should do so.
And yet, this is not some lifelong policy style – it’s a recent decision. That takes even more guts.
For others? Yes, I think it would work for most people, but I think many people’s lives revolve around certain secrets. If they suddenly opened up about them, told all when asked, their relationships would fall apart, their families disown them and their jobs evaporate. It takes both courage and discretion to be totally honest. It’s admirable, but it’s harder than it looks in several different ways. To do it, to do it carefully and to do it judiciously. A fine balancing act.
You seem to be making it work. I, for one, am impressed.
For me?
I’m trying to do it, but only in part. There are some things I still feel would be very harmful for some people to know, and I see no benefit in it. So I’m keeping some cards close to my chest, while being more open about others – including close, painful, personal stuff – than ever before.
I hope it works out in the long run.
I have to add this part…
It hasn’t done with Kjersti.
I told the woman I love what I really wanted and needed, and what it was that she was doing that I really could not stand.
Look what happened.
Is 303 words enough?
